A Song for Stan

Here is a set of lyrics to an 80th birthday song

Stan is a genial chap with a long history of service in the police and to brass bands in general. So his first posting to a small island was quite an uneventful time apart from minor emergencies which turned out to be a simple mistake leaving him lots of time for his beloved fishing. He used to train the young brass bandsmen in his area with great success except for one very close relative!

Stan’s birthday song to the tune of “The Floral Dance”

Now Stan, he is a music man
With his cornet, bass and euphonium.
He’s marched his way across the land
In the *** Constabulary Band,
But don’t forget our Jack had a major role
In setting up the ** band we know.
He trained the little kids to learn their parts,
Which was a great success apart from one called ****!

First posting as a man in blue
In the * Isles to make a force of two.
He found that there was not much crime
And so he took up fishing just to pass the time.
One day an island farmer called up late
“You must come over now” to investigate
My traps have disappeared for quite some time
I’m much afeared and had to dial 999!”

So Stan the brave not one to shirk
Sat- down and did all the paperwork.
Important to stay nice and cool
So he leapt straight on to his bicycle.
“Don’t worry sir, breathe a sigh of relief”
The farmer said “I’m afraid there is no thief,
There is no need for you your truncheon to wield,
I’ve found the traps all lying in another field.

There’s stories we would like to lose
Like the talent show singing on his latest cruise.
He could have had a baker’s van,
But he chose to be an undertaker man.
Now his organ playing drowning out the home
With his fuchsias and all his garden gnomes
We – salute you now our dear Grandad Stan
On having 80 candles now to burn!!